Monday, February 23, 2009

VLCD Day #22: The End Is Near

Alright people. I have made a decision. Today is the last day of my injections... for now. 

Let me explain.

For the last week or so I just have not felt good. I have been starving, having major cravings, grumpy, and really run down. Aunt Flo is not due for a visit for quite some time, and I am not sick. 

I think I mixed the last vial of HCG wrong. 

I know I know, you're thinking "But M! Goddess of bacteriostatic water, bringer of HCG! How could YOU ever falter?! For surely if you have, then I, as well, have mixed my HCG incorrectly." but don't fear my shrinking friends, I too make mistakes. You are in the clear. 

Last week I only lost 1.5 lbs. The week before it was 2.5. I could theoretically do about that in a week of heavy exercise and a strict diet. Laying off the weight lifting and only eating 500 calories is ok when I am losing a significant amount of weight and not feeling like crap, but that is not the case here. So either my body gets particularly resistant to this stuff quickly, or I mixed it wrong.

Either way, I think it will be beneficial for me to take a break. This morning I had my last injection for about 3 weeks. I am going to start to transition into P3 on Thursday, which will be 72 hours after my last injection. S will then finish another week, which will bring him to the minimum of 23 days on the injections since he started a week after me. Then he will join me on my quest for the holy grail, I mean, stabilization on P3, and we will start the second half of our injections on March 14th.

I have read that many people have better luck on the shorter rounds, and the average losses are a lot higher. I don't mind waiting another 3 weeks to drop the next 10 lbs that I want to lose, especially if I can keep my sanity.

And really, I feel great about the 10 pounds that I have lost! I bought a pair of size 5 jeans yesterday since my 7s were literally falling off of me! That was pretty great! I just need to see if I have the discipline to stabilize myself now on P3.

Today is another day of carb-heaven here at the office. Why must everything revolve around delicious food!? It's pizza day, which we have once a month, free pizza! All you can eat! Or better yet, just stick it straight down your pants and pack it onto your thighs. ALSO, a co-worker brought in GIRL SCOUT COOKIES (aka the nectar of satan himself) and another brought in the very same SOFT, ICING-LADEN SUGAR COOKIES THAT I WAS CRAVING LAST WEEK. I think if I venture to go near them, I have to get some duct tape and make myself a little belly-belt out of assorted snacks. Kind of like those pregnant suits that sex-ed classes made teenage girls try on so they would abstain. 

Goddammit. 

Willpower is definitely lower when you have decided that you are going to take a break, and you haven't eaten anything besides apples and chicken for the past 3 weeks. But I need to just take a deep breath and realize that a break from HCG cannot equal eating whatever I want on a whim, and gaining back the 10 lbs I have already lost. Breathe. BREATHE, DAMMIT! IN! OUT! IN! OUT! REPEAT! OK! THERE!

I'm going to keep updating this of course with my P3 adventures, and then on to my next round of shots. So stay tuned for tomorrow, where I eat only 500 calories and NOT take a shot that is supposed to make me full! Wheee! :D

I can get through this. pizza I will get through this. chocolate cake I will be successful. cookies I will PREVAIL! I think I am developing food-tourettes. 

Not Quitting, Just Adjusting,
M

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